By Aniré Okene
Knowing someone really well helps us maneuver difficult situations, but in the process of getting to really know someone – what they like, dislike and approve of, frictions and misunderstandings may occur. I remember how difficult it was for my girlfriend and I when we first became friends.
We realized that we wanted a friendship beyond just being friends, but in the heat of our heightened feelings for each other, we began to have tough times seeing everything eye-to-eye. The situation was new for both of us and our heated-conversations were getting more frequent and unhealthy. We however overcame it all by listening to each other more and understanding our differences while staying focused on building our wonderful friendship together.
Quarrels arise in relationships due to misunderstandings, but how we deal with such chaotic times determines how far such a relationship can go and how long it will last. The idea that “I’m always right” is wrong. After intense conversations with my girlfriend, she always reminded me that we were not fighting each other, but trying to make sense of the situation(s) at hand.
And that resonated well with me. Misunderstandings shouldn’t always lead to quarrels or heated conversations. Misunderstandings are opportunities to get to understand each other better, faster, and be more respectful of each other’s feelings and unique personalities.
The idea that a perfect relationship is void of trouble is false. There will always be times when couples fight and annoy one another knowingly and unknowingly. But that shouldn’t hinder the growth process you and your partner are on. Instead, it should inspire you both to be more empathetic, slow to anger, and quick to forgive one another when misunderstandings happen. Misunderstandings are a huge part of growth in a relationship.
While some people react to situations instead of responding to them, how you handle misunderstandings in your relationship can either make your bond stronger with your partner or further drive you apart from one another. Always listen to each other! Find out what makes your partner tick. Misunderstandings could be healthy if handled correctly.
Don’t shy away from confrontations. Be respectful of each other’s feelings & always listen. You might just learn a thing or two about your partner that you never knew.
– With Love, From Love.